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NEW YORK (CAP) - Members of the popular tech websites Engadget and Gizmodo are planning to meet at the flagpole at 3pm tomorrow to determine once and for all which site reigns supreme, according to emails surreptitiously obtained by CAP News. Both sites stopped short of confirming such an event is in the works.
"Alexa numbers, ad dollars, none of that matters right now," said Gizmodo's Brian Lam in an exclusive sit-down with CAP News. "All that matters is that we put the smackdown on Rojas and his cronies and just be done with it."
Lam then smashed a SCSI card on the edge of a table and waved its jagged edges in the air at an imaginary foe. He winced as one of the edges pricked his finger, and then excused himself to go find a band-aid.
"Listen, if it's a fight Lam wants, it's a fight Lam gets," Engadget founder Pete Rojas said as he curled his hand around a roll of quarters. "I will go iPod on his Zune ass and not even think twice."
Rojas and Lam have both accused the other of playing dirty leading up to the big fight, with Rojas claiming that Lam plans to bring in ringers from the streetgangs.com message board because "Gizmodo users don't even know how to make a fist."
Lam has in turn accused Engadget users of illegal mods and overclocking, a practice typically frowned upon in tech gang fights. Lam said he was surprised to hear they're taking such an approach because "sucker punches and pulling hair is more their style."
Bloggers around the internet are abuzz with the news, with some saying they plan to Twitter live from the event as it's happening. A number of SEO's have already approached both sites with promises to make them #1 in search rankings for the term cat fight.
Some emails read by CAP News staffers indicated that if the cops get wind of the event, the venue may be changed from the flagpole to that little grassy area behind the high school near the gymnasium.