Tuesday | March 19, 2024
Gary Busey Has Preemptive Frontal Lobotomy
Gary models his spring line.

HOLLYWOOD (CAP) - In an attempt to "stem the tide of wacky" that continues to engulf Gary Busey with each successive appearance on Celebrity Apprentice, the 68-year-old actor has opted to undergo a pre-emptive frontal lobotomy before the next season of the hit reality show.

In a rare unscheduled interview with Jimmy Fallon on Late Night, Busey said he was buoyed by Angelina Jolie's decision to have a double mastectomy based solely on her statistical chances of contracting breast cancer and decided to do some math of his own.

"See, if 63% of America thinks I'm crazy, and 47% voted Republican in the last election, then that leaves a 10% chance I could get hit by a bus while crossing the street," Busey told Fallon.

Fallon then asked, "What if the bus is driven by a Republican?" to which Busey responded by getting down on all fours and crawling around the set.

"One might successfully argue that Gary Busey has already had a frontal lobotomy," said CAP News Health Editor Noley Thornton. "But kudos to him for recognizing that there are no more local stops on the crazy express."

Fans across the world have been offering their support for Busey's decision, with many saying Donald Trump would be crazy himself not to invite Busey back for another season of Celebrity Apprentice. Even if that doesn't work out, CAP News sources say Busey is in talks with VH1 to have a couple cameramen just follow him around all day for a new show called, Being Busey.

"And if that falls through, you may just see Gary pop up randomly on various reality shows, offer a few pearls of wisdom, and then go on his way," said the source. "He could become the Ted McGinley of reality TV."

The source did confirm that Busey's first appearance after the surgery would be ABC's Celebrity Chainsaw Juggling, the outcome of which could lay the foundation for the remainder of his television career.

- CAP News Staff

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