Thursday | July 31, 2014
Millions Now Embarrassed They Loved 'Les Miserables'

HOLLYWOOD (CAP) - It made more than $432 million at the box office worldwide, but now that it's out on DVD and Blu-ray, the musical sensation Les Miserables is causing consternation among viewers who are finding the film they loved in theaters to be "embarrassingly ridiculous" at home.

"Oh my God ... What was I thinking?" asked Donna Hetweiler, 44, who says she loved Les Mis in the theater but was now cringing as she watched Anne Hathaway coughing and crying in the privacy of her Madison, Wisc., living room.

"On the big screen she seemed so, you know, epic," said Hetweiler. "On my TV she just looks like a skinny, mucousy Anne Hathaway."

Millions of other watchers apparently agree, returning the DVD in droves with complaints about Russell Crowe's "guttural warbling," Hugh Jackman's "squeaky croon" and Sacha Baron Cohen's "unfettered hammery."

"That's the phrase they keep using - unfettered hammery," said a spokesman from Universal Pictures assigned to field the myriad complaints. "It's starting to get kind of unnerving."

"I saw this in the theaters five times and cried every time," said Marc Hurwitz, whose Facebook group I Desperately Want Hugh Jackman to be Gay" has more than 500,000 followers. "Now I'm watching it at home and every time Jean Valjean stares into the camera with that panicky, tortured look, I throw up.

"Literally, I'm hurling," he added, holding up a bucket.

Film historian and New York Magazine critic David Edelstein pointed out that a darkened theater can provide a viewing experience that fully immerses the audience, keeping it from noticing things like plot discrepancies, or overacting, or when the principals in a musical can't really sing.

"But at home, all those things are in fact magnified," he noted, adding also that in your living room it's easier to throw up without being ostracized.

Also critical of the film has been Hollywood legend and musical veteran Julie Andrews, who says that her breasts are still perkier than Anne Hathaway's.

- CAP News Staff

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