Friday | March 29, 2024
Brothers Unite Against JC Penney T-Shirt
The controversial t-shirt in question

BOSTON (CAP) - While the fervor over JC Penney's controversial t-shirt has died down since the company pulled the shirt from store shelves, one local group is using the clothing store's wardrobe malfunction as a cataylist against unfair stereotypes. Brothers Against Unfair Stuff has launched protests across the state, asking male siblings to boycott the store for carrying the girls' t-shirt that read, I'm too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me.

David Cote, 37, of Avon, spoke with reporters on behalf of the group while conducting a protest outside of one Massachusetts store along with some 30 other men, all of whom claimed to be victims of female sibling bullying.

"We object to JC Penney's suggestion that young men are simply there for the betterment of their sisters," said Cote. "Today's boys are strong and independent, no longer coerced into doing their sisters' homework, doing their sisters' laundry, or doing the dishes when it's their sisters' turn. Unless, of course, their parents tell them to.

"Let them do their own damn homework," Cote concluded, drawing cheers from the group.

Madison Cleary, 14, who was waiting for her mom to pick her up at a nearby mall entrance, rolled her eyes at the protesters. "Boys are so dumb," she offered.

"I've considered outsourcing my homework to my own brother, who's 16, but he's seriously SO stupid that I would NOT let him near it. I don't even think he can read," she added. "If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. That includes algebra."

Mothers Against Everything (MAE) spokesmom Darlene Fortenski also expressed her concern with JC Penney, suggesting the marketing gaffe could drive away one of the company's most targeted consumers: moms. "They always carry really cute turtlenecks at Christmas time," said Fortenski. "I add one to my collection every year and I've been eyeing the one with reindeer on it for this year's addition.

"But this is just a shame; I'm going to have to take my business to Sears now," Fortenski noted. "I can't put my hard-earned money behind a company that so blatantly stereotypes against girls and boys alike. At least pick one.

"I guess JC Penney hates all children equally," Fortenski concluded sadly. "Let's hope Sears can take advantage of the flux of moms who will be looking for elastic-waist jeans and applique sweaters."

While JC Penney did not offer an official response to the protest, CAP News caught up with one beleaguered executive at a bar outside of the company's Texas corporate headquarters.

"We pissed off the whole damn internet. We had to fire more than half of our marketing department," the executive, who asked to remain anonymous, said as he ordered his fifth beer. "Then there's the surplus stock; we tried to donate the shirts to the American Red Cross and the Salvation Army, and they both basically told us, thanks but no thanks."

As outrage over the offensive t-shirt and word of the resulting Massachusetts protest went viral, other famous brothers came forward to offer their support. The Jonas Brothers issued a statement, suggesting that "brothers must stick together in solidarity no matter what the cause, unless there's a girl who is not your sister involved, and then it's every dude for himself."

British rockers Noel and Liam Gallagher, formerly of Oasis, were rumored to have been working on a statement of support for Brothers Against Unfair Stuff, but the two could not agree on the wording and each subsequently stormed off before the press release could be completed.

- CAP News Staff

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