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Gingrich Calls Obama The Fried Chicken President
WASHINGTON (CAP) - Republican presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich continued his verbal assault on President Obama yesterday as he made campaign stops throughout poor areas along the flooded Mississippi River. Following a recent speech in Georgia where he called Obama "a food stamp president," Gingrich further lashed out at the commander-in-chief when he referred to him multiple times as "the fried chicken president."
"What is it with you people and race?" Gingrich said as reporters called him on his use of the dichotomistic phrase. "I've got a whole food thing going on here and all you people can think about is race. What I meant is that he is a very unhealthy choice for this country."
The White House immediately issued a statement denouncing the health allegations, inferring that President Obama "makes very nutrition-conscious decisions with his food," noting that he enjoys a side of collard greens either sauteed or simmered in a ham hock bath with his fried chicken, and often follows it up with a couple slices of seedless watermelon for dessert.
"And as far as the race thing goes, the president enjoys both white and dark meat," said White House Press Secretary Jay Carney. "He is equally at home devouring a breast as he is a thigh, original recipe or extra crispy."
Obama's food habits first came under scrutiny late last year when he opted to increase the number of croutons he puts on his lunchtime salad, much to the chagrin of his political rivals. Pundits say that with Donald Trump no longer vying for the Republican nomination, someone needs to step forward to get America's attention.
"The only way you're going to win the GOP nod is if you say some really wacky shit," said CAP News political analyst Fuad Reveiz. "This definitely constitutes some really wacky shit."
A number of GOP leaders have also tried to distance themselves from the former speaker of the House, with many issuing brief statements or comments indicating that Gingrich should "put a lid on it." High-ranking House Republicans said they are quite able to make veiled racial accusations against the president on their own and don't need Gingrich's help.
"What? What did I say? It's not like I said he's out there stealing hubcaps," said Gingrich. "He's the president. He has people who can do that for him."
Gingrich stuck with the presidential food theme at various stops, tailoring his speeches and commentary to his locale. During a swing through the Texas Panhandle, he said Obama "follows the same destructive food service model that destroyed the Chi Chi's Mexican restaurant chain."
Then at a later stop at a diner in eastern Pennsylvania to grab some lunch, he lambasted the president's healthcare policies as "oozing yellow pus not unlike the fake Velveeta cheese used instead of real Cheddar to make this hoagie."
From there, Gingrich made a quick stop at Mt. Sinai Medical Center so doctors could surgically remove his foot from his mouth. As he was being wheeled into the operating room, staffers said they could overhear him saying something about how Obama "probably likes the old, fat Elvis instead of the young, hip Elvis, too."
Doctors say it's too early to tell if the surgery was a success.
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