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Obama Offers Aguilera His Teleprompter For Grammy's
LOS ANGELES (CAP) - President Obama made a nice gesture today when he announced at his morning press briefing that pop star Christina Aguilera was welcome to use his teleprompter during her singing appearance at the Grammy's this Sunday. The generous offer comes on the heels of Aguilera's performance of the national anthem at the Super Bowl where she forgot some of the lyrics.
"As a man who doesn't speak unless, uhh, the words are written and scrolling in front of my face, I feel for Ms. Aguilera's situation," Obama said. "As such, I will be, uhh, more than happy to have my people drop off my teleprompter for her on Sunday afternoon and, uhh, pick it back up later that evening.
"I've given it a lot of thought and, uhh, I think I can go a handful of hours without needing to talk," the president added.
Aguilera has not publicly stated that she'll take the president up on his offer, but sources close to the 30-year-old singer say she "breathed a huge sigh of relief" upon hearing of it. The New York native is scheduled to take the stage at the Grammy's along with four other singers to perform a music medley tribute to Aretha Franklin, who is recovering from surgery back in December.
"She's just been a bundle of nerves since the Super Bowl, smacking her head with her hand and saying stupid stupid stupid over and over again," said a close friend of Aguilera's. "And for the Grammy's, she has to know the lyrics to, like, six songs for the medley, which we wondered might be five and a half songs too many.
"We were telling her that because there are other singers with her, if she forgets the lyrics, just mouth the word apple until she finds her place," added the friend. "Hopefully they weren't planning on her doing a solo."
Critics of Aguilera's star mangled banner performance say some Aretha Franklin songs could be a good way to kick off her Lyric Comeback Tour 2011, with one allowing her to just repeat the word Chain over and over again and another simply requiring her to spell the word Respect. "Or maybe she can be the one in the background tossing in that extra Think! during that song's chorus," noted one music industry insider.
"Hell, if they play it right, she won't need the teleprompter at all," added the pundit. "She can just write the words on her hand and she'll be golden. Unless she gets sweaty, then all bets are off."
But President Obama said he really thinks the teleprompter is Aguilera's best bet, recalling the time he tried to jot a few notes for a campaign speech onto the palm of his hand rather than use the teleprompter. He ended up flubbing his way through the speech, blurting out random campaign promises off the top of his head since he couldn't remember what he had prepared beforehand.
"You see, The Man only makes dark ink and it didn't show up so well," Obama noted. "Thankfully nobody remembers all those wacky campaign promises I made or else a lot of people could very well dislike me."
Pundits agree that Aguilera should not underestimate the power of Obama's teleprompter, pointing out that it even has its own Facebook page.
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