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Rand Paul ISO Blacks For Friendship, Maybe More
NEW YORK (CAP) - Embattled Senate candidate Rand Paul continues to backpedal on inflammatory statements he recently made about civil rights - this time, taking out a full page ad in the New York Times to show his kindred spirit with "the darker persuasion." The ad will run in the national edition of the paper to be distributed tomorrow.
"Rand Paul's Special Message To All Blacks," reads the headline of the mocked-up copy of the ad received by CAP News. The ad then goes on to say that "I think we got off on the wrong foot" and "I'd really like to be friends if you'll just give me another chance."
Critics are already lighting up the blogosphere, charging that while Paul apologizes out of one side of his mouth, he continues to put his foot in the other. According to The Huffington Post, Paul told a number of Times reporters that if he were an American League owner back in 1973, he wouldn't have voted for the designated hitter rule.
"Does Rand Paul have any idea how many blacks would be out of a job if we didn't have the DH?" asked civil rights activist Jesse Jackson on Meet The Press. "That's right, Rand Paul, let's let all those white pitchers who can't hit bat in place of the black guys who can."
Paul also spoke out against the Obama administration's criticism of BP's handling of the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, calling it a travesty that the president would demand accountability from the company responsible for what will likely become the largest oil spill in history.
"Would he be acting this way if the oil spill were white? I don't think so," said Paul. "The fact is that this black oil is washing up on our white, sandy beaches. Don't hate the company. Hate the oil."
Paul canceled his own appearance on Meet The Press, instead opting for a sit-down interview with Oprah that will air later this week. A tape of the interview obtained by CAP News shows the two bantering about topics ranging from growing up in Texas to how much he used to love the TV show Benson.
"I like blacks, Oprah, I really do," Paul told the talk show host. "I mean, that's how I take my coffee. I don't need any white cream to make it taste better. You say one lump or two: I say no lumps."
Reports that Paul has enlisted Republican luminary Sarah Palin to handle his public relations are as yet unfounded, with Palin telling CAP News that she doesn't know who he is and asking us if we had his name backwards. When we explained about his controversial remarks, the former governor seemed equally perplexed.
"I wouldn't know anything about that - we don't have any of your afro-blacks up here in Alaska," Palin said. "I seem to recall Bristol showing me a picture of one once on the Google, but I don't think it was real because God doesn't make men like that. It was like a firehose."
Sources close to Paul say the Kentucky Republican is truly trying to learn from his mistakes and has been drawing inspiration from the book Ol' Strom, the unauthorized biography of Strom Thurmond.