Friday | March 29, 2024
Al Qaeda Chief Takes Credit For Katrina, Bush, Mondays
During his capture in 2003, Mohammed also tried to take responsibility for bad hair days.

WASHINGTON (CAP) - Admitted 9/11 mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammed has told a U.S. military tribunal he was responsible for the carnage unleashed on New Orleans by Hurricane Katrina in 2005. Furthermore, he also accepts blame for putting President Bush in office, and Mondays.

"When Americans wake up every Monday morning after a weekend of frivolity and fun and head to their menial jobs, think of me," Mohammed said in a Pentagon transcript of the hearing. "I am personally responsible for that day."

The admission was part of testimony that was originally removed from that transcript of the interview that took place at the U.S. military base at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. Pentagon officials had been concerned about public reaction to the claims.

"We've known about 9/11 for a long time. Pearl's decapitation, the shoe bomber - none of it surprises us," said a senior U.S. intelligence official. "But what he's done to all of us with Mondays - this is the stuff office shootings are made of."

According to the 26-page transcript, a computer hard drive seized during Mohammed's capture contained meteorological data for New Orleans and six other cities along the Gulf coast, along with documentation about the Louisiana city's levee system. And a file cabinet later removed from a house in Pakistan was found to be crammed full of U.S. presidential ballots covered in hanging and dimpled chads.

All told, Mohammed has taken responsibility for over 30 operations. However, in the 9/11 commission report, he is described as having a tendency to exaggerate the truth. As such, officials say they're not sure where reality ends and his sick fantasies begin.

For example, despite having been captured by U.S. troops in 2003, Mohammed is also claiming responsibility for the vote that sent Brandon Rogers home from American Idol, but kept Sanjaya Malakar around for another week.

Pentagon officials said a total of six high-value detainees have now gone through these hearings. However, they would not confirm whether any of the detainees were subjected to the Supreme Court-approved interrogation techniques of Dr. Phil.

- CAP News Staff

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