Sunday | April 26, 2015
Weapons-Grade Plutonium Price Hits All-Time High
Members of the CAP News International Bureau discuss the recent price spikes at this year's Symposium On Macro Terrorist Economics.

WASHINGTON (CAP) - The price of weapons-grade Plutonium surged $200 over the past three weeks to an all-time high of just over $4,000 per gram, according to an international survey. And with the start of terrorist season just around the corner, prices are not expected to drop anytime soon.

"This latest price surge smashes the record high for the third time this year," said independent terrorism economist Omar McNalley. "At this point, you have to think it's starting to be priced out of the range of your average terrorist."

Indeed, according to the Bureau Of Labor Statistics, the purchasing power of the average terrorist for Plutonium and other nuclear materials has declined steadily over the past decade, with more and more nuclear threats coming from firms with established terrorism programs.

However, Homeland Security officials warn against thinking the war against terrorism will be won on cost alone.

"The same amount of nuclear material is moving into the wrong hands now as was a year ago," said Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson. "It's just moving into fewer hands. Allows us to keep a closer eye on it, but it's still out there."

According to McNalley, a bump in the price of enriched Uranium, Isotopic-U3O8 35%, is at least partly to blame for the Plutonium spike. And he said that while it's not apparent now, taxpayers will eventually feel the pinch of these rising prices.

"Not only are terrorists having to reach deeper into their pockets, but so are the legitimate users of Plutonium," McNalley said. "This means needing to funnel more taxpayer dollars into nuclear programs, which will in turn take that money away from other things like the war in Afghanistan that isn't taking place."

Economists are in general agreement that the recent price hike may help keep nuclear technology out of Iran's hands for at least a little bit longer.

- CAP News Staff

SHARE STORY
MORE business NEWS
RELATED STORIES
LEGAL
ALL MATERIAL IS

SATIRE

AND ©2005-2015 BY CAP NEWS
Starbucks nixes plans to raise awareness of racial inequality by allowing patrons to only purchase drinks that match the color of their skin «» Burger King announces plans to remove unhealthy options from kids meals, will offer empty boxes for $1.99 «» After avoiding jail for sharing state secrets with his mistress biographer, David Petraeus said if he had to do it all over again, he would because "the sex was really, really good" «» New York City vows to reduce its output of white trash by 90% over next 10 years, promises better class of resident "to make country proud" «» New study finds that adults who breastfeed are 58% more likely to be ostracized by their peers and ridiculed for having a milk mustache «» A new poll finds 73% of those who would buy a consumer drone plan to use it to fire BB's at neighborhood dogs who come into their yard to poop «» Massachusetts court upholds conversion therapy law that allows Red Sox fans to seek professional help for spouses who are Yankees fans «» Organizers of the 150th Anniversary Lincoln Assassination Reenactment say in hindsight, it may not have been a good idea to have Nicki Minaj perform "Bang Bang" «» Hillary Clinton says if elected president, she will provide everyone free email accounts on her private server, complete with 2GB of storage «» Major League Baseball implements two-drink minimum at all stadiums to help fans forget just how much time they're spending at the park for a single game «»
Starbucks nixes plans to raise awareness of racial inequality by allowing patrons to only purchase drinks that match the color of their skin «» Burger King announces plans to remove unhealthy options from kids meals, will offer empty boxes for $1.99 «» After avoiding jail for sharing state secrets with his mistress biographer, David Petraeus said if he had to do it all over again, he would because "the sex was really, really good" «» New York City vows to reduce its output of white trash by 90% over next 10 years, promises better class of resident "to make country proud" «» New study finds that adults who breastfeed are 58% more likely to be ostracized by their peers and ridiculed for having a milk mustache «» A new poll finds 73% of those who would buy a consumer drone plan to use it to fire BB's at neighborhood dogs who come into their yard to poop «» Massachusetts court upholds conversion therapy law that allows Red Sox fans to seek professional help for spouses who are Yankees fans «» Organizers of the 150th Anniversary Lincoln Assassination Reenactment say in hindsight, it may not have been a good idea to have Nicki Minaj perform "Bang Bang" «» Hillary Clinton says if elected president, she will provide everyone free email accounts on her private server, complete with 2GB of storage «» Major League Baseball implements two-drink minimum at all stadiums to help fans forget just how much time they're spending at the park for a single game «»