Tuesday | March 31, 2015
John Tesh Shuts Down Own Social Media Site
Desperate times call for desperate measures at johntesh.com.

LOS ANGELES (CAP) - Troubled times have begun to hit the entertainment industry as the faltering economy is forcing iconic performer John Tesh to shut down his fledgling social media website. However, he plans to continue his blog for now since it's hosted by a free online service.

"It is truly a bummer because I feel we were making fantastic inroads," Tesh told CAP News during an exclusive collect call phone interview. "We had just about doubled traffic since last May, and that doesn't include all the visits from [wife] Connie [Sellecca].

"My web statistician felt confident we would have hit double digits by the end of this month," Tesh added.

Tesh's social media site was just the latest project by the musician to stay financially solvent as he continues to watch his popularity wane following his departure from Entertainment Tonight well over a decade ago. Other efforts have ranged from a radio show to a daily calendar to free copies of his old CD's that are "just taking up too much space in the upstairs hallway."

"In two weeks I'll be launching a new program called John Tesh Handyman where I will personally come to your house and take care of various odds and ends," Tesh said. "And all I ask for in return is something along the lines of a sandwich or handful of crackers. A small pittance."

Tesh said his wife has been extremely supportive of his recent struggles, especially since she hasn't appeared in anything that anyone has ever heard of since the TV show Hotel back in the late '80s. Sellecca has reportedly been trying to break Melissa Gilbert's record for Most Lifetime TV Movie Appearances and is the reward for one of Tesh's recent money-making schemes, "Kissing For Cash."

"But no tongue," Sellecca said. "Well, okay, if someone really shows us the money, then tongue is fine. Wanna buy some skin care products?"

Tesh said he laments not being able to get his social media site off the ground but plans to live vicariously through fellow washed-up entertainer David Hasselhoff, whose social media network now lays claim to more than 17,000 members - most of them in Germany.

"Looking back, I think I needed something catchy like his whole Don't Hassle The Hoff thing," said Tesh. "I should have gone with my original idea of starting a site called thejohn.com.

"That way we could have built some buzz around things like, Hey, have you visited thejohn today? or Sorry I'm late for the meeting, I was busy checking out thejohn," added Tesh. "You know, that kind of thing."

Tesh's new CD, Listen To The Sounds My Computer Makes, is due out in stores early next month.

- CAP News Staff

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Audubon Society reports birds returning to Massachusetts for spring are "confused as shit" and not sure where to go until it warms up «» Apple accidentally unveils new watch at 12pm instead of 1pm after forgetting to turn device forward an hour for daylight savings «» FCC rules Internet providers must stream all porn at the same speed, whether it's hot babes or skanky ho's «» ISIS hacks U.S. military's Instagram account, posts pictures of last night's dinner and terrorists making duck lips «» NSA offers voucher to Israel for free course on spying and other illicit surveillance to help them not get caught next time «» NFL announces plans not to broadcast half a dozen Oakland Raiders games next season, offers cash prizes for anyone who notices which ones «» Starbucks nixes plans to raise awareness of racial inequality by allowing patrons to only purchase drinks that match the color of their skin «» A letter sent to the White House has tested positive for proper grammar and punctuation, leading to speculation that it must have come from overseas «» Ted Cruz says he wants to become president so his dog can pee on the White House lawn «» New survey finds 73% of Americans feel like a nut 54% of the time, while 63% of Americans don't 47% of the time «»